-
Cots will be placed in the
foyer for those who say, "Sunday is my only day to sleep in."
-
There will be a special section with lounge chairs who feel that our pews are too hard.
-
Eye drops will be available for those with tired eyes from watching T.V. late Saturday night.
-
We will have steel helmets for those who say " The roof would cave in if I ever came to church."
-
Blankets will be furnished for those who think the church is too cold and fans for those who say it is too hot.
-
Score cards will be available for those who wish to list the hypocrites present.
-
Relatives and friends will be in attendance for those who can't go to church
and cook dinner, too.
-
We will distribute "Stamp Out Stewardship" buttons for those who feel that church is always asking for money.
-
One section will be devoted to trees and grass for those who like to
seek God in nature.
-
Doctors and nurses will be in attendance for those who plan to be sick on Sunday.
-
The sanctuary will be decorated with both Christmas poinsettias and Easter lilies for those who never have seen the church without them.
-
We will provide hearing aids for those who can't hear the preacher and cotton for those who say he is to loud.
